When the school year began, the school held another “Block Party” on the first Friday. The student organizations and student resource centers would gather on the main street leading into the school and set up booths for students to browse while they wait and watch entertainment on the main stage. Having had some time before I needed to go home that day, I decided to visit the booth of the Pilipino organization.
I stayed at that booth for a while, even helping with a few outreach attempts towards the incoming freshmen. After an hour or two, I decided to leave to go home so that I could hang out with my old high school friends like a usual Friday.
On my way to my car, I dropped by the booth for the local hip-hop dance troupe to say hello to some friends, including Kyleen. I still had a soft spot for her, so I decided to go look for her. When I got to their booth, there she was, next to the table. She greeted me and we gave each other a friendly hug. Then, she said something to me that made me stop in my tracks.
She informed me that Jackie and Lysette were there. Kyleen had actually just told the two of them to look for me at the Pilipino student organization’s booth, where I had been a few moments before. All I could say was, “Really?”
She pointed me back towards the direction from where I came, and so I turned back to look for Jackie and Lysette. I was not exactly sure why I was even looking. I did promise Jackie in my letter that I was no longer going to attempt any contact with her. But, my legs were already carrying me back to the Pilipino organization’s booth.
Before I knew it, I was back, saying hello to more friends that I had not seen earlier. I took a quick glance around, and then quickly resolved to leave again. Jackie and Lysette were nowhere to be seen, so I just gave up the search that I did not even want to take part in.
I turned back towards Kyleen’s booth just to tell her that I had not seen Jackie or Lysette. Then I said goodbye accompanied by another hug.
Without hesitation, I walked to my car. I did not turn around. I did not look back. I had no reason to do so.
Later that night, after having gotten home from hanging out with my old friends, I uploaded the pictures that I had taken that day onto my internet photo web log. That photoblog entry is long gone now; I just erased it a few weeks ago to make room for future photos.
As I was deleting my old entries, I came across the one for that day and read what had originally been written by me. It said:
“Some interesting information was given to me today, and I waited for something. It did not happen.”
That pretty much sums up everything that ever happened in this story. I was always enticed by something, prompting me to wait. Whatever I had waited for, however, never arrived. I waited for so long for something that was never going to come.
I would not call it a waste of my time, though. I do not regret anything that I did, even if I did not initially like the outcomes. I like to think that how I turned out was better than what I used to be.
If I had a chance to do so, would I do it all over again? No. And, if I had to, I would not change a thing. My past makes me who I am today. I am quite satisfied with that.
